If you asked other people in "real life" what they think of when they think of me, they might say cats, and... oh, I'm getting stuck already!... Diet Mountain Dew, and purple, and Disney, and Elsie, and candid honesty, and autism... okay, I think that's enough to make my point. This is racking my brain!
My point is, though, that people will probably never say anything like "assertive." Or "stands up for herself." Yeah, not much of that goes on here.
I've been called the r-word and I know people who have intellectual disabilities, and the few times I've heard the r-word said in public, I couldn't get my words together fast enough to defend them, me, us, anyone. I'm pretty ashamed to admit that, but it's the truth. And if I can't stand up for others, imagine trying to stand up for myself. It's even worse.
But I've decided something. I've figured out the words, so that won't be an issue, and this is what I'm going to say...
The next time someone either asks, "But don't you want to/think you should lose weight?" (and we're talking not doctors here. My, uh... former... BSS is the most recent example.), I'm going to say: "Actually, I'm beautiful and perfect just the way I am. My nutritionist and doctors say that I'm healthy. If people disagree, I guess it's going to be their problem, because I'm happy. But thanks for your concern."
Enough said.
And I remember you wrote out a long list of things not to say to people (to you) when they have weight. (was it on Facebook or was it on the blog?)
ReplyDeleteLike talking about a thing which is not related to weight and complimenting them on that.
Yes, it does take a great deal of theory of mind to write!
Good on you for standing up for your space in this world.
And I would say back, "I'm glad your team agrees with you that you're healthy, beautiful and perfect".
Sounds like a good plan. I don't understand why people feel others should have the same ideas they have all the time - talk about lack of theory of mind!
ReplyDeleteBTW, the word "former" used in relation to your BSS is a beautiful sound to my ears! (I'm assuming that means the person you've been writing about most recently is gone.)