Sunday, October 18, 2009

Big screen woes

Blame it on processing issues. Blame it on sensory issues. Blame it on attention issues. Whatever you want to blame it on, I have serious TV-watching issues. I can't follow the plot line of TV or movies. Maybe the best way to explain this is to tell you my understanding of the plot line of some of my favorite movies, and you can compare it to your understanding of them.

Star Wars: It's a long time ago; far, far away. There is some sort of alliance. There are bad guys trying to take over the galaxy. Some people have the Force, which means that they can either become bad or good (Jedis). Darth Vader grew up as a Jedi but turned to the dark side; his son Luke is a Jedi. There are Ewoks. There is R2D2. There is C3PO. Uhhh... that's about it. How many hours of movies is that? That's all I got.

Lord of the Rings: Some guy made all these rings a long time ago, and there is one ring that controls all the other rings that Bilbo found back in the day. Now his nephew is trying to get it destroyed. I can never keep track of who's bad and who's good and who's fighting what side. The elves come in somewhere. There's a Fellowship. Uh, something about two towers. We think Gandalf dies, but he's really okay and comes back again. Gollum had the ring for too long and turned creepy.

Moulin Rouge: Christian kind of lies and makes Satine believe that he's a duke, but he's not a duke, and she falls in love with him. But then she finds out he's not a duke and she's mad. So they write a play? Right. So they hide their love the whole time. And then Satine dies. There's a lot of singing and dancing, though!

As you can see, I really struggle. I get bits and pieces, but I can never figure out how one thing relates to another. Mind you, what I wrote is basically everything I got from each of those movies... not just the summary. Maybe the problem has to do with not understanding people's intentions. I know some of it has to do with not understanding why/when people are lying (or not disclosing the full truth about things)... that really confuses me. I still really like to watch movies though, which really doesn't make sense. I like to watch the Food Network and Discovery Health... that, I follow just fine.


  1. I am a sucker for pretty much anything on TLC (John and Kate plus 8, the show where they make cakes, Little People Big World, Say Yes to the Dress, and What Not to Wear are some of my faves)! I don't watch tv regularly, just whenever I have time/feel like it - those are all great shows for randomly dropping in and watching, even if you're distracted the whole time by something else, which I usually am haha.

  2. I didn't understand Moulin Rouge either, and it was an assault on all five of my senses. (Well, perhaps, not taste: at least in the gustatory sense).

    Sometimes I find movie intentions easier to understand than the ones in real life.